No one is listening. The thoughts of how unfor-filling it is to be talking to a blank screen rush through my mind at a thousand miles a minute. What if no one ever listens? What if this resolution was all for nothing because if they're not finding happiness I cant! Who is they? It's upsetting to think that an eighteen year old statistically bound mother is writing in a blog to a bunch of free internet space. There are so many things I want to do with my life and this just takes up time. But it is a stepping stone. How can I ever be successful if I can never be happy with the everyday mundane? It's a tricky subject.
But thats when my husband slinks over to me carrying our little daughter High Voltage Violet with a big smile on her face like sunshine making me realize that this wasn't for anyone else but me and her. And I sink off into the background to go hold her thinking that I dont need anything else in the world. Not even the paparazzi of imaginary people in my head. And until she can fathom up a word as big as fan i'll just be my own for her.
Pursuit of Happiness #3: Sometimes it's okay to be your biggest follower.
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